It’s 5am and I’m looking for something. In my head, I mean…and I can’t quite get to it. Something I remembered, something I forgot, something I need to do – does this happen to you? “I have too much on my mind”, I think, “too much to do today.”
This is my daily mantra.
I am a woman who does too much, often with joy but occasionally without. I actually do too much to the point that, if I have too much of what I don’t like to do, I will create more to do that I do like. (Example: our first ever Triangle Moms On Main charity event is being planned for May 2 from 6-9pm. Save the date.)
Some simple truths about women who do too much:
– We often feel that we have too much to do.
– We may have too much to do because we feel bad saying no.
– Our “too much to do” does not often include doing things for ourselves.
– We are proud when someone says “I don’t know how you do it!” even though many times, neither do we.
– We love a sense of accomplishment, and so we’ll keep doing too much to achieve that fleeting feeling.
– We must be kept busy…if we don’t have too much to do, we get nervous or restless.
Which makes me wonder: is doing too much incurable?
When I was younger, my mom gave me a book called Meditations for Women Who Do Too Much by Anne Wilson Schaef. At the time, I remember glancing through it, thinking it was a little old-fashioned (aka for older women, not my late-20s self) and set it aside. Now I only wish that I could find it. The online description reads “For women everywhere who do it all–work, chores, raising kids, and meeting everyone’s needs but their own–comes a purse-sized daily antidote for the overloaded.” Sign me up!
Basically, the book provides very quick thoughts for each day, focused on topics like communication, solitude, etc. With or without the book, this is something to consider – reserving space for yourself in an otherwise “too busy” day.
It’s It’s a bit late for a new year’s resolution, but I’m making one right now: find 30 minutes twice each day for myself. During this time, I will:
– Read and meditate on an uplifting thought or story
– Fully develop an idea that I’ve written on a post it and stuck someplace
– Pray (in a focused way, not in the car because I have a minute or because I am in a desperate moment)
– Find something that is bothering me and make a plan to resolve it
– Make a list of ways to settle myself and find the joy in doing too much.
Are you a woman who does too much? How do you manage?
Triangle Moms on Main